How Long Should a Baby Wind Down Before Bed
How long should a baby wind down before bed?
Short answer: A minimum of 15 minutes before naps and 30 minutes before bed time
Long answer: See below! :)
Why is a wind down routine essential for a baby?
Think about the last time you couldn’t fall asleep.
Tossing and turning in bed, getting up a million times for a final visit to the toilet, going over everything you have to do tomorrow, worrying about impending bills or something important you’re doing next month.
ARG!
We’ve all been there.
So, then why is it so easy to fall asleep sometimes?
Take the time to recall both an easy falling asleep experience and one that took an hour or longer.
Patterns emerge.
Most often, not being able to sleep is because your mind is racing.
This means you’re overstimulated and haven’t had the chance to relax before bed.
This is exactly why your baby needs to wind down before bed.
Even when your baby hasn’t had a busy day in your eyes, they have been so busy learning and observing everything around them that their brains can easily get overstimulated.
What causes overstimulation?
Screens – phones or TVs
Overly hot baths
Loud noise
Lively socialising
Exercise
Avoid screens completely
It is SO easy for a baby or toddler to become overstimulated.
It’s best to avoid screens entirely for the first year, if not three years of your child’s life.
If screens are a big part of your life and you simply don’t want to do this try having no screens just one hour before nap and bed times.
This will make a WORLD of difference because screens emit a blue light which supresses the sleep hormone, melatonin, causing your baby to feel awake.
In terms of hot temperatures, an overly hot bath is easy to solve and is much more an adult thing than a child concern.
How many times have you sunk into a nearly painfully hot bath?!
On the other hand, with babies this would be bad for them so we’re all obviously extra careful to ensure the temperature of the bath is never too hot.
Baby baths are usually only luke warm. This is a perfect temperature as your baby’s body will not suddenly heat up dramatically and have to cool itself down right before bed.
Keeping loud noises to a minimum before bed becomes more of a challenge as your baby turns into a toddler.
Create a quiet rule one hour before bed where everyone colours, draws or reads.
Exercise is a cute one because when your baby is learning to crawl or walk you’ll actually need to encourage them to rest and not practice their skills too intensely before bed in case of overstimulation.
Overstimulation will lead to overtiredness.
Obviously, this is not such an easy rule to stick to when your baby is eager to get practising their newfound skills.
BUT, a good way to deal with this is by having a longer wind down routine. The longer the better.
Wind down routines have been found to:
Calm the nervous system
Create a trigger for the brain
Reduce stimulation
So, what is the ideal wind down routine?
Especially before bedtime, the ideal wind down routine for your baby can start as early as two hours before sleep time.
Wind Down Timeline
Two hours before – no screens
One hour before – reduce the noise of the house and any intense exercise/movement such as rough housing or running about
45 minutes before – you can take your baby up to their bedroom as early as 45 minutes before bed
The room should be dark, cool, silent and safe.
Click here to read more about the ideal sleep environment for your baby.
Summary of the ideal sleep environment
Dark – use a black out blind to ensure the room is completely dark. This will act as a trigger to your baby’s brain to release the sleep hormone – melatonin
Silent – if your house is not silent try a soothing lullaby music to block out external noises which could disrupt your baby’s sleep. We love Brian Eno’s Apollo album!
Cool – the temperature of your baby’s room should be no higher than 68 farenheit or 22 degrees Celsius
Safe – check out the government guidelines to ensure your room meets the criteria
Wind down routine continued
In a darkened room feed your baby (if they are still feeding at this point)
NOTE: The ideal wind down routine applies to all babies and all toddlers, no matter their age.
The ideal wind down routine will be easier to implement at 3 months old but it is certainly possible at 5 years too.
You just have to stick to it.
Whatever you do, don’t reverse your decision once you have chosen to create a wind down routine.
The rule is: ALWAYS do your wind down routine no matter where you are in the world, or what kind of day you have both had.
Stick to it religiously.
If your baby is no longer bottle or breastfeeding you can offer a small snack.
See the pre-approved list below.
Not all babies will need food at bedtime but often between the ages of 1 and 2 children can feel very hungry and a small sleep snack will ensure they go to sleep feeling happy.
Pre-approved bedtime snacks
A banana is the only allowed snack
If you absolutely do not have a banana and are in need of something the only two alternatives are oatcakes or wholemeal rice cakes.
There is no other equivalent because the snack has to be a source of tryptophan which will release serotonin into the body, the sleepy hormone.
Anything high in sugar will stimulate your baby and wake them up.
The Wind Down Routine Continued
Read to your baby or toddler in the darkened room (a low light should be on because who can read in the dark?!
But not too bright as we are creating a sleepy environment)
Do not create a magical theatre performance with your story. Now is not the time for an Oscar worthy recital (tell that to me the drama school deprived theatre loving mama!).
Now is the time for hushed voices and a slow relaxed telling of a favourite story.
Try these books for excellent bedtime reads:
Each Peach Pear Plum
Rabbit’s Nap
Where’s Spot?
Cuddle your baby before putting them in their cot
Say the same words – Goodnight. It’s sleep time now. I love you.
And leave the room.
NOTE: You’re not trying to sneak out of the room. You’re creating a relaxed and happy environment where your child knows you are leaving and doesn’t mind as they are soothed and close to falling asleep
What to if the ideal wind down routine doesn’t work straight away?
1. You have to stick to the rules. SO, check you have met all the guidelines before wondering why it’s not working – no screens at all at least one hour before bed (two hours is better), no sugar, no intense exercise or games, no loud noises – shouting, playing, etc, create the ideal sleep environment – dark, cool, silent and safe
2. You need to give it enough time. This routine needs a minimum of three days to work, ideally seven. Some babies will adjust rapidly while others need two weeks to settle into this new routine. Even positive change takes time for the brain to adjust and enjoy
3. Your baby is used to something else – even if you didn’t have a routine in place your baby will still be used to whatever you were doing before. This means they may cry at first because they’re thinking what is going on? It isn’t that the new routine is bad, it’s that it’s new and different. They’ve never known anything else. SO, create security by sticking to your new routine. Don’t change. This is a healthier and far better routine for their overall quality of sleep and happiness
4. They’re older – when toddlers are over two years they’re able to protest more. Plus, their habits will be ingrained and they’ll know they have more power and say in what happens. However, you’re the parent here. This is a positive move towards a healthier and happier life where everyone gets the sleep they need leading to happier moods, a greater ability to focus, better eating habits and less tantrums and healthier brain function overall. Sleep affects everything. Stick to it. Mama (or dadda) knows best!
What to do if your baby cries
1. Wait outside for thirty seconds – use your phone timer to ensure you stick to this
2. Go back in after thirty seconds (leave your phone outside the room) cuddle your baby and say the same words – ‘Goodnight. It’s sleep time now. I love you.’
3. Keep your time in the room brief. Aim to leave your baby in their cot while you pat and soothe them. However, if you feel they need you to, then of course, take your baby out of the cot and cuddle them until they feel soothed and happy. Use your instincts. This is a gentle process
4. Once you have left the room this time, wait outside for 45 seconds
5. Repeat the time in the room keeping it brief, hushed, relaxed and calm with as little talking and moving as possible
6. Wait outside for 60 seconds
7. Keep lengthening the time you wait from 30 to 45 seconds to 60 and then 90, 120, 180 seconds and so on
Summary
How long should a baby wind down before bed
A baby should wind down for 30 - 45 minutes before bedtime.
And 5 - 15 minutes before any naps.
An ideal wind down routine involves no screens, no sugar and no extremes (temperature of baths, loud noises when playing).
The preparation for a wind down routine should begin at least one hour before bed (if not two hours).
The wind down routine in the bedroom should be 30 – 45 minutes long and will involve feeding (or a sleepy snack and water), cuddling and reading in a darkened, cool room.
Overtime the wind down routine will become a very special part of the day in which your baby (and you!) can process the day and wind down slowly in a soothing and peaceful environment.
It’s a lovely opportunity to cuddle and read which everyone can look forward to.
Of course, at first you may face a bit of protesting but mama knows best!
You’re teaching your baby a skill of a lifetime.
Everyone sleeps longer and deeper when they have given their brain time to wind down and process the day before bed.
Essential items for best baby sleep!
Bluetooth speaker
Baby sleeping bag
Wooden cot without retractable sides
Black out blind
Baby books
If you need more help or prefer video content purchase the Abundant Baby Extended Video Sleep Course today.
You will receive
Sleep schedules
Worksheets
2 hours of 1-1 pre-recorded sleep seminars with me, Tilly! (mother of two and baby sleep expert and consultant)
On demand video content to use as and when you want
6 modules that grow with you and your baby
Specific advice on separation anxiety, teething and every sleep regression