Dreamfeed
A dreamfeed is the answer to everything.
It can often be the one thing that pushes your baby through to a full night’s sleep.
It is totally safe and a great idea for all babies.
Contents for this blog all about dreamfeeding!
I had no idea what a dreamfeed was when I first started being a mama.
As a first time mama it’s common to have no idea what all the new words mean. There’s a whole set of new vocab to learn and wow it can be overwhelming.
There’s so many phrases to learn – dreamfeed, sleep triggers, wind down, sleep signals, sleep windows, drowsy but awake. So, let’s start with a dreamfeed because when understood and done correctly it is an absolute LIFESAVER.
What is a dreamfeed?
A dreamfeed is basically feeding your baby while they’re asleep.
When I first heard of dreamfeed I thought surely a baby who is asleep can’t feed at the same time?
You’ll either wake your baby up by trying to feed them or you won’t be able to feed them properly because they’ll be fast asleep.
But, the truth is, it’s the ideal solution for most babies.
For me and my baby, it was the best answer to sleeping for longer. She was happy and content because she was not hungry. It meant we all got more sleep as a family because we could relax in the knowledge that our daughter was fed and happy.
What is a dreamfeed?
What exactly is a dreamfeed and how do I do it?
Dreamfeeding is when you feed your baby when you go to sleep even though they’re already asleep. By incorporating a dreamfeed into your schedule, you will be in sync with each other.
You’ll know your baby has had milk just as you go to sleep.
Because, after all, your baby has no way of knowing that you fed them at 7pm, went to sleep at 10pm and would like to sleep all night.
Of course, they could easily wake at midnight needing milk.
By dreamfeeding you feed your baby and reset the schedule.
You make an active decision to align with your baby and get your times sorted so you don’t get woken up later when you’re trying to sleep. You have a much higher chance of getting a longer stretch of sleep.
It’s an excellent way to help older babies to sleep through the night or, at least to enjoy a much longer stretch of sleep at night.
When is a good age to introduce a dreamfeed?
A great age to start dreamfeeding is 3 months. Research has shown that fitting in an extra feed between 10pm and midnight can reduce night wakings and help to avoid extremely early morning wakings. It’s a wonderful addition to your life and may well be a crucial part of your baby’s sleep schedule.
Three months is an ideal age to start dreamfeeding.
For many mothers a dreamfeed is a really important part of the routine.
It gives you an opportunity to give your baby more calories and ensure they’re full and happy as you go to sleep.
NOTE: I count the dreamfeed calories as day time calories because it is in your control and doesn’t affect your sleep.
Depending on how comfortable you feel with letting your baby sleep for longer at night this could be your chance to get six hours of consecutive sleep every single night, even at the early age of three months old.
Example dreamfeed schedule
Dreamfeed schedule at 4 months old
11.30pm – Go to bed and dreamfeed
12 midnight – Sleep
6.00am – Wake and feed your baby to start the day
Midnight may seem an incredibly late time to go to sleep but for me, I preferred this than going to bed at 9pm and getting constantly woken up. It meant that my husband and I had time to ourselves before bed and it felt like we were getting a real night’s sleep every night.
You may prefer to wind down and be in bed from nine or ten but I wouldn’t recommend dreamfeeding until 11 as this way you have more chance of sleeping through the night.
Not every parent is happy letting their baby sleep for longer stretches at night but this suited me and my baby perfectly at this early point in her life. She naturally woke up at 6am, sometimes 5, needing milk and for me it was as if I’d had a full night’s sleep.
Sure, six hours is short but it was not interrupted. It was six hours of consecutive sleep.
If it wasn’t for this, I would have felt entirely different.
I was able to let my baby sleep for longer at night because I had given her plenty of milk during the day. She was used to getting the majority of her calories during the day rather than at night.
Without a dreamfeed, this would not have happened. My baby would have gone to sleep at 6pm and woken up at midnight to be fed. Technically, that’s still six hours but it wouldn’t have benefited me because it wouldn’t have been aligned with my sleeping time.
Dreamfeeding allows you to align perfectly with your baby before you go to sleep.
How exactly do you dreamfeed?
Get ready for bed (I would go up first before my husband so I could dreamfeed alone without making too much noise)
Once ready for bed tiptoe into your bedroom and get into bed
Lean over to get your baby out of their cot – this is going to feel totally unnatural – what if you wake them?? But don’t worry it works
Do everything quietly but don’t stress about waking your baby. You have made the choice now – some babies will wake up completely. This is how you know dreamfeeding isn’t for them. However, if you do it quietely and peacefully enough and rouse your baby just enough to feed them, it will be an amzing part of your sleep routine
Your movements should be confident – gentle but confident - because you want to be as smooth as possible with the dreamfeed
Make sure your baby is comfortably in your arms. They should still be in their sleeping bag and you should not change their nappy (unless you absolutely have to)
As soon as the nipple or teat of the bottle is stroked against your baby’s cheek or near their mouth they will naturally open their mouth to feed
This feed should be slightly briefer than normal – less than 15 minutes. Most probably 5 – 10 minutes
Next burp them – this is a number one rule. Again, it will feel like you are waking your baby up but as long as you keep quiet, do not talk, keep the room dark and be aware that this is a dreamfeed so it should all be a part of your baby’s sleep, it will be fine. If you don’t burp your baby, they’ll be uncomfortable and they’ll wake up for sure.
Once burped put your baby down in their cot and roll over and go to sleep
It’s that easy! And the good thing is, you will know in the first few days whether dreamfeeding suits your baby or not. You don’t have to wait long to find out. Try three days and see how it goes.
Some babies love a dreamfeed – they settle back to sleep easily and hardly seem to have been disturbed at all.
Others, fully wake up no matter how quiet you are and it seems to do more harm than good because you have to soothe them back to sleep.
The best thing to do, is to give dreamfeeding a try and see if it suits you and your baby.
Best night lights for dreamfeeding
A low light night light is essential for a successful dreamfeed. You can’t put the main light on and you can’t even put a normal lamp on as it will be far too bright. You’re looking for the lowest light possible where you can see enough to know what you’re doing and make sure your baby is feeding properly, while still creating the night time atmosphere which is essential when dreamfeeding.
I found the squidgy lights were the best because they were quiet to turn on and off and they looked pretty too!
See Below For Three Of The Best Nightlights
Babymoov night light
Amazon breastfeeding light
Polar bear light. Insert and image for both and a rating with three pros and three cons
So, how do you know for sure if dreamfeeding doesn’t work for you and your baby?
Dreamfeeding is not for you if…
1. Your baby wakes up as soon as you enter the room
2. They will not have milk unless they are completely awake
3. After feeding, your baby seems completely awake and struggles to get back to sleep
Take the chance to find out whether dreamfeeding will work for your family. Three days is ideal.
What time should I dreamfeed?
The ideal time to dreamfeed is between 10pm and midnight. Don’t dreamfeed after midnight because then it’s technically a night time feed.
Whatever time you choose, go to sleep immediately afterwards. This way you’re both sleeping with the same potential hours in front of you. You could have a stretch of six hours asleep with your baby fast asleep happy and content.
A dreamfeed could be a lifesaver!
Is dreamfeeding safe?
The only downsides that I can think of with dreamfeeding are the potential to disturb your baby while they’re sleeping and worries that dreamfeeding is not safe.
So, is it safe?
The good news is. . . Dreamfeeding is 100% safe. This is because you’re not dreamfeeding your baby while they’re lying down fast asleep with no awareness that you’re feeding them.
You’re feeding your baby in your arms in the exact position they normally feed in during the day. You will have roused them gently by stroking their cheek first so they are physically ready to feed, even if they’re half asleep.
They’re ready to feed, they’re hungry and they’re happy to have milk.
By burping your baby afterwards and putting them gently down in their cot you’re 100% eliminating any unsafe aspects.
Not only has your baby been fed safely, they have been burped too so there is nothing uncomfortable or not good going on for your baby.
In fact, it’s the opposite of not good or unsafe.
Your baby has received a top up of milk before they even had a chance to get hungry or stressed and have to wake up to ask for milk AND they’ve had an extra cuddle from their mama before sleeping for the night.
It’s an amazing way to be in control of your sleep and know exactly where your baby is in their feeding schedule.
Dreamfeeding was the exact reason why, even as early as 3 or 4 months of age, I was able to get 5 – 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep every night.
I knew my baby had had plenty of calories during the day and I was even topping them up at night with the dreamfeed before I went to sleep.
Another amazing advantage is that you are getting your baby used to sleeping for longer at night.
If your baby is in a cycle of waking continuously at night this can be more challenging to change. However, if, thanks to dreamfeeding, your baby is used to sleeping for a much longer stretch of time at night, you’ll find that they are just as precious about their sleep as you are.
It’s nice to sleep for longer. It makes you feel good and it makes your baby feel good, too. They won’t want to lose that and they’ll won’t want to be disturbed.
They’ll do all they can to keep sleeping for longer stretches at night.
Dreamfeeding lays the foundation down for longer stretches of sleep at night and a much healthier and deeper sleep overall.
It allows you to work on the same schedule so your baby isn’t waking up when you want to sleep.
Why not be in control of your baby’s sleep and choose a schedule that works for you?
Dreamfeeding helps your baby because ultimately they don’t want to have to wake up and cry to be fed. No one enjoys that. It is much more peaceful for your baby to be able to keep asleep and receive a little cuddle and top of milk without waking up to cry for more.
So, when should you stop offering a dreamfeed?
It's important to know when to stop dreamfeeding too
Nine months is the perect age to stop.
Once your baby is able to sleep through the night without milk, a dreamfeed is redundant. Remember, the only reason why the process began was because your baby could not make it though without milk.
They got too hungry.
At nine months of age your baby is physically able to sleep through the night.
All a dreamfeed will do at this age, is create a habit of feeding which you simply don’t need.
Dropping a dreamfeed is one of the major steps towards sleeping from 7pm to 7am
Check out the full Abundant Baby Sleep course for the ultimate module - module 5 part 5 - where you will learn how to drop the dreamfeed at a time to suit your baby and get the 12 hours of sleep you need!
Abundant Baby Sleep Course
If you want to learn how to sleep through the night from 7pm to 7am or would like more information about dreamfeeding, check out module three part four of the Abundant Baby sleep course.
The Abundant Baby Sleep Course is an extended sleep course for life of six modules from newborn all the way to five years and beyond. During the video course you will learn how get 12 hours of sleep at night and 2 - 3 hours during the day.
You’ll learn a sleep routine which will benefit the growth and development of your wonderful baby and the happiness and energy of you, the wonderful mama!
It will be your lifesaver and support you as you embark on a sleep journey with your baby.
Why not be one step ahead and purchase the course BEFORE giving birth?
This is the perfect time to watch the course at your own pace and get ahead with exactly what to expect when your baby arrives.
By preparing beforehand you’re able to recognise sleep regressions and you won’t even blink when major sleep obstacles come along like teething, separation anxiety and learning to crawl.
PHEW, there’s a rollercoaster to come but with a solid sleep routine you’ll both get the sleep you need to feel happy, healthy and positive.